.
About Me

- Maverick
- i am a simple down 2 earth guy with lots of aims and plans 4 life. I seriously believe if seriously pursued nothing is impossible to achieve.
Saturday, October 26, 2013
Thursday, February 17, 2011
React or Respond – Cockroach Story
She started screaming out of fear. With panic stricken face and trembling voice, she started jumping, with both her hands desperately trying to get rid of the cockroach. Her reaction was contagious, as everyone in her group got cranky to what was happening.
The lady finally managed to push the cockroach to another lady in the group. Now, it was the turn of the other lady in the group to continue the drama. The waiter rushed forward to their rescue. In the relay of throwing, the cockroach next fell upon the waiter. The waiter stood firm, composed himself and observed the behaviour of the cockroach on his shirt. When he was confident enough, he grabbed and threw it out with his fingers.Sipping my coffee and watching the amusement, the antenna of my mind picked up a few thoughts and started wondering, was the cockroach responsible for their histrionic behaviour? If so, then why was the waiter not disturbed? He handled it near to perfection, without any chaos.
It is not the cockroach, but the inability of the ladies to handle the disturbance caused by the cockroach that disturbed the ladies.I realized even in my case then, it is not the shouting of my family, friends or my boss that disturbs me, but it’s my inability to handle the disturbances caused by their shouting that disturbs me.
Its not the traffic jams on the road that disturbs me, but my inability to handle the disturbance caused by the traffic jam that disturbs me.
More than the problem, it’s the reaction to the problem that matters.I understand now:-
I should not react in life. I should always respond.
The women reacted, whereas the waiter responded.
Reactions are always instinctive whereas responses are always intellectual.
So React or Respond?
Sunday, March 14, 2010
.........and they lived happily ever after.
It was too late now. She had to get married "NOW" to the guy...The guy whom she had seen once and talked thrice. The guy about whom she knew nothing at all but for his name and work. everything happened in a hurry and everything was over before she could breathe again... here was she with this guy, all alone in this hill station... how can anybody send their daughter such a long distance with a stranger???
"Hey look at that....!!!" he shouted in excitement... she shrugged and looked where his finger pointed... Bright colored balloons dotted the sky.
Children were jumping in joy and he seemed to be completely absorbed into it...colors are always exciting...but not now. She was not with her friends, not with her team mates, not even with her parents. This was not a
3 day tour or team building trip. This was her life and she has been forced to start off with this person.
Loneliness and discomfort with this stranger was sickening...She looked at him in wonder... does he even realize that he has married me? Does he understand that he has to love me, protect me, care for me, a new girl, a stranger, all his life?
The marriage morning started like a daylight nightmare for her. The first time in life she felt she should have fallen in love and then married somebody. Some man who she would have felt more comfortable with, someone whom she could call by name and introduce to friends, someone whom she could trust. But marriage morning was obviously not the time to think all these.
Her parents would never have said "no" if she had declared that she was in love. But she was not emotionally attached to anybody she met, especially guys. She was very friendly, playing, teasing, but never had second thought for any man around her. That brought the entire responsibility of looking for a groom on her parents' shoulders. Her parents had a very bad time with this entire process. They started their groom search with unending operation. The concatenation of "Horoscope matching" & "Decent family" & "Good looking" & "Good pay" & "same cast" & so on... that always gave 0 output. Now after all that 8 months hunt, they were not ready to hear her "ifs" and "buts" for this 'good guy'.
She had explained to her father. She does not feel anything for this person. He is nothing more to me than any other software professional. Like list of names she sees in the chat rooms. Distant and usual.. Her father asked her to talk to him and even meet him and discuss their likes and dislikes. That meeting started like the induction programme self introduction and ended like a 3 hour seminar. She was waiting to get away from that place. "So did you talk with him?". "yes". "was he polite and decent". "yes". "Oh he got that special flavoured tri-color icecream...!!!".OK. All her family and relatives discussed... She was given the chance to "understand her life partner" and that they have understood each other "well" and she is ready for the marriage now.
All arrangements geared up and it was 24 days after her first meeting that she was getting married to her man... perfect match as everybody else described. Marriage hall was full with excited people, kids got the chance to play, ladies got the chance to wear the silk saree. The smell of rose and jasmine filled the hall. Different poses for the photographer and artificial smiles for the videos. The moment he had tied the sacred thread was unexplainable vaccum in the head. It was over. She was his wife. Accepted by the society and law. Her proud parents were relaxed. This was their duty they had been planning to fulfill since she was born. All this crowd will fade away, leaving her to explore her new world...
He pulled her hand gently to sit on the stone bench. The bench was wet and the chillness was indeed enjoyable. "So what are you thinking about?"...that was an unexpected ball. Should she reply? Should she be silent? She remembered the two hour presentation she had taken last month. Bold and confident, she kept answering all the queries with a broad smile. Now she remained silent. "Do you know honey... I was not for this marriage too..."
Oh my God... what did i hear??? did HE tell that or did i think aloud? what does he mean? didnt he like me? was he forced into this? He must have noticed the quizzical look on my face...with a gentle smile he continued..."I wanted to look for a girl myself, buy her everything, care for her, argue with her, laugh and cry with her, then get married to her...
Anything otherwise would be a drama. Traditional drama and i was not for it anytime. But my love for my work and also my stress would not give me time and mind to search that girl...When your parents talked to me 2 weeks before our marriage, about your fear of getting married, to a stranger, i could completely understand your mind. I could see myself in you and that was the moment i decided i will marry you. There was no time to prove myself to you, make you trust me, everything happened in a hurry. But there was the entire life before me, to please you, to love you, to make you trust me. This is no less than what i had dreamt, the girl i was waiting for, is you. Now tell me... will you love me???" Tears came down her cheek.
Her parents had done more than their duty. They had found her the perfect guy. Thank you Mom!!! Thank you Dad!!! His question remained unanswered yet both knew the answer...
Monday, May 18, 2009
The Reply
The mini truck stopped in front of the double storied building at the corner of the street. As few laborers proceeded to unload the truck and carry the contents, which were mostly furniture and regular household goods into the house, the man looked at his newly acquired house and gave a silent smile. After nearly three decades he was back in his hometown. Two weeks back he had retired from his job and with a part of the amount he received he had bought this house. He was back in the city where he was born, where he grew up, got married and where he was blessed with a son. Promotion had followed his son's birth and required him to leave the city. Frequent transfers over the years had all the more increased his longing to settle in a place where he thought he belonged to. And today the time had arrived.
Days passed and he along with his wife comfortable got adjusted to their new home, neighbours and colony. One striking feature he found about his colony especially the street in front of his house was that it was exceptionally clean. He knew that it was the duty of the municipality to keep the surroundings of residential areas clean but he did not expect such a response. The sweepers, two of them, a man who was nearly of his age and the second who was in his mid 20's would be there everyday by dawn and carry out their duties. Somehow he felt that he had met the older sweeper before, but couldn’t remember when.
It was the Diwali time. The gentleman wanted to give a handsome bakshis to both the sweepers, in fact he was waiting for them to come and ask for it. Diwali came and went away but the men didn't come for what was awaiting them. Finally one fine morning he called the older sweeper, and pulled a 50 Rupee note asking him to share it with his co-worker. The sweeper smiled and said," I still get my wages for what I do and so does my son". He went away for the day. At once it struck to him why the older sweeper had seemed familier. Years ago when his son was born in a city hospital, this sweeper was there with his wife who was a nurse. When the Doctor broke the good news to him, out of happiness he had offered few Rupees each to the sweeper and his spouse as the latter had assisted his wife during the delivery. But both in turn had refused the money with a reply similar to the one he had just got. The reply had pleased him then and had pleased him now too.
The reason behind the exceptional cleanliness of the colony was now clear to him. Keeping back the currency note in his pocket, he silently saluted the two walking men.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Life goes on and on............
Tuesday, August 05, 2008
"This too will pass....!!!"
ALL OF US at all the times.
Once a king called upon all of his wise men and asked them,
" Is there a mantra or suggestion which works in every situation, in
every circumstances, in every place and in every time. Something which
can help me when none of you is available to advise me. Tell me is
there any mantra?"
All wise men got puzzled by King's question. One answer for all
question? Something that works everywhere, in every situation? In
every joy, every sorrow, every defeat and every victory? They thought
and thought. After a lengthy discussion, an old man suggested
something which appeal to all of them. They went to king and gave him
something written on paper. But the condition was that king was not to
see it out of curiosity. Only in extreme danger, when the King finds
himself alone and there seems to be no way, only then he'll have to
see it. The King put the papers under his Diamond ring.
After a few days, the neighbors attack the Kingdom. It was a
collective surprise attack of King's enemies. King and his army fought
bravely but lost the battle. King had to fled on his horse. The
enemies were following him. His horse took him far away in Jungle. He
could hear many troops of horses were following him and the noise was
coming closer and closer. Suddenly the King found himself standing in
the end of the road - that road was not going anywhere. Underneath
there was a rocky valley thousand feet deep. If he jumped into it, he
would be finished...and he could not return because it was a small
road...From back the sound of enemy's horses was approaching fast. King
became restless. There seemed to be no way.
Then suddenly he saw the Diamond in his ring shining in the sun, and
he remembered the message hidden in the ring. He opened the diamond
and read the message. The message was very small but very great.
The message was - " This too will pass."
The King read it . Again read it. Suddenly something strike in his
mind- Yes ! it too will pass. Only a few days ago, I was enjoying my
kingdom. I was the mightiest of all the Kings. Yet today, the Kingdom
and all his pleasure have gone. I am here trying to escape from
enemies. However when those days of luxuries have gone, this day of
danger too will pass. A calm come on his face. He kept standing there.
The place where he was standing was full of natural beauty. He had
never known that such a beautiful place was also a part of his
Kingdom. The revelation of message had a great effect on him. He
relaxed and forget about those following him. After a few minute he
realized that the noise of the horses and the enemy coming was
receding. They moved into some other part of the mountains and were
not on that path.
The King was very brave. He reorganized his army and fought again. He
defeated the enemy and regain his lost empire. When he returned to his
empire after victory, he was received with much fan fare at the door.
The whole capital was rejoicing in the victory. Everyone was in a
festive mood. Flowers were being thrown on King from every house, from
every corner. People were dancing and singing. For a moment King said
to himself," I am one of the bravest and greatest King. It is not easy
to defeat me.: With all the reception and celebration he saw an ego
emerging in him.
Suddenly the Diamond of his ring flashed in the sunlight and reminded
him of the message. He open it and read it again: "This too will pass"
He became silent. His face went through a total change -from the
egoist he moved to a state of utter humbleness.
If this too is going to pass, it is not yours.
The defeat was not yours, the victory is not yours.
You are just a watcher. Everything passes by
We are witness of all this. We are the perceiver. Life come and go.
Happiness come and go. Sorrow come and go.
Now as you have read this story, just sit silently and evaluate your
own life. This too will pass. Think of the moments of joy and victory
in your life. Think of the moment of Sorrow and defeat. Are they
permanent ? They all come and pass away. Life just passes away.
There is nothing permanent in this world. Everything changes except
the law of change. Think over it from your own perspective. You have
seen all the changes. You have survived all setbacks , all defeats and
all sorrows. All have passed away. The problems in the present, they
too will pass away. Because nothing remains forever. Joy and sorrow
are the two faces of the same coin. They both will pass away.
You are just a witness of change. Experience it, understand it. and
enjoy the present moment.
Thus spake Swami Vivekananda.....
Friday, August 01, 2008
Abode of 'Problems & Solutions'
How true....ever wondered from where problems come from? No they do not get imported from some distant heaven or hell but are a part of our own junk of creations. You can't totally avoid or ignore them but for sure you can solve them. Most of the times its the apprehension or the magnified image created in our mind which makes us believe abt the existance of a non existant gargantuan monster called 'PROBLEM'.
Always believe in solving the problem from a third person's point of view.Imagine that an aquaintance drops in and mentions that he is struck. He goes on describing his misfortune while you are curiously waiting to know the reason (read problem) for that. Once he comes up with the problem, u'll find a plethora of solutions in guise of thoughts revolving around your mind just like rings around Saturn. You tend to ponder as to why this person is creating a mountain of a mole hill when the solutions are so clear. The reason is again the same...."No problem can ever be solved by being a part of it."
Imagine as if you are travelling in a car and all of a sudden the car breaks down. Say you have to push the car to a nearby mechanic. Now how are you going to do this? Would you push the car being inside it or would you come out and then try the same. Obviously by coming out of it. Now try corelating this from the perception of a problem. Lets say the car is our problem. and the solution is to push it aside. Would a person ever be successful if he tries to push this car by being inside it??? No matter the amount of force he applies the status quo would still be maintained. And if he comes out and tries the same, it wont be suprising that he would be able to move it with much lesser strain.
Moral of the story : No problem can ever be solved by being a part of it.
Think about it....